Living Outside The Box

LIVING OUTSIDE THE BOX By Terri Andersen
When the title subject was suggested for our writing assignment this week, my first thought was, “what have I got to say about living outside the box - I've lived most of my life inside the box - followed the rules, obeyed my parents, worked as a secretary, then got married and raised a family. That's what was expected and that’s what I did. Then I made myself think back over my life and realized there were times I lived outside the box. For instance, at age 6 or 7, my friend Annie and I picked up trolley transfers that people discarded on the street and we rode to the end of the line and back without our parents having the slightest idea of what we were doing. From age 10 and throughout my teens, instead of doing what the average kid was doing, I was a salesgirl, a buyer for sheet music and greeting cards, plus a window display decorator at my parents music store. As a buyer for sheet music, it was my responsibility to keep track of what was selling and what was not, then order what we needed from a company on Broadway in New York City. I'd take the subway to New York by myself to pick up special orders and to see what was new that I thought might sell in our store. We also sold greeting cards as a side-line and it was my job to be sure samples were displayed and numbers were kept track of to reorder when the salesman came. I know some of them hated dealing with a kid, just by the way they'd ask where the owners were, but if they wanted an order they had to show me their merchandise and I was the one to give them their order. When I graduated high school and became a secretary, I decided to join the USO so I could dance often. It so happened the USO was held in a YMCA and in order to be a hostess I had to have a letter of recommendation from my boss. When he got the form to fill out, the first question he asked was how come I was joining the men's YMCA instead of the women’s YWCA. So I guess I could say that was a step outside the box for that day and age. When I got married and stayed home to raise a family, I guess I lived in the box by taking care of the kids, catering to my husband, going to church every Sunday, and pretty much doing whatever the average housewife did. As a senior citizen I figured I'm still living inside the box, but when I see what's going on in the World today, I have second thoughts about that. It seems somehow the box became inverted and the inside is now the outside. Today's norm seems to be casual sex, wearing clothing that almost completely exposes the breasts and barebelly buttons, dancing that emulates the sex act, hair that looks like Someone chopped it up with an ax, and couples living together without benefit of marriage. When a 14-year old girl laments the fact that she's the only one in her class who hasn't had sex yet, when her classmates are, and when college students feel it's okay to cheat on tests, something's twisted - in other words what my generation considered wrong is now considered right and the way to go. Being faithful in a marriage, going to church every Sunday, even dressing modestly has become opposite the norm. So I guess I’m living outside the box now.

A Fun Ride

A FUN RIDE by Terri Andersen
This past summer, three of my sons decided to go white-water rafting in Tennessee. Two of the boys lived in North Carolina and the other son lived in Connecticut, from where he and a friend traveled to meet the other two in Tennessee. After the adventure they said they had an exciting ride and I was glad to hear that.
Last week Jim, one of our sons from North Carolina, came to visit my husband and me in Connecticut and somehow we got on the subject of near death experiences. Conversation was flowing smoothly until Jim told about the time he felt certain he was about to die and how surprised he was at how peaceful he felt and ready to accept it.
In typical mother astonishment and aghast at such news, I asked when that took place, since it wasn't something we had ever talked about before. Much to my surprise, I got the full story of what happened on the white-water rafting trip last summer.
It turned out that at a certain point in the rafting experience, the boat hit some rocks and the guide got out of the boat to direct it away from the rocks. When she thought it cleared the rocks, she jumped back into the raft and capsized it, causing everyone in the raft to fall into the water.
One of our sons broke a finger when he tried to hold onto a rope while falling into the rapids, and the other two found themselves unable to balance themselves into an upright position. Jim, the son who was relating the story, said he was upside down in the water, caught under the raft, and full of water in his lungs because he didn't get a chance to hold his breath before he fell.
It was at that time that he felt sure he was about to die, his lungs bursting and his mind confused about which way was up. Finally someone yelled to him to grab a rope they were trying to reach him with but he told us he just couldn't grasp it, until finally there was a knot at the bottom of the rope that kept his hand anchored and they were able to pull him up from the water.
As it turned out, he wasn't the only one in trouble. Another son had fallen into the water also, and couldn't stop shaking when he was pulled out. Son number three was the one whose finger caught on a rope and who landed up with a finger broken in two places before he was dragged back into the raft. His friend landed up being picked up by another raft just in time.
“Oh, my God,” I said, “what a horrible experience. I bet you'll never go white water rafting again,” only to hear my son say, “Are you kidding? That was exciting. Sure
we'll go again. Now we know what to do to keep from falling into the Water.”
Oh, vey - and they wonder why mothers get gray hair.