I am amazed at how much power I have.

T's* VIEW
I am amazed at how much power I have. As a wife and mother, I find I can set the tone for the entire household. If I'm grouchy, everyone seems to pick up on it and become grouchy, too...whereas if I'm calm and loving, all the ruffled feathers are smoothed and peace reigns. So many times one harsh word is enough to start an avalanche of disgruntled feelings. In reverse, it's surprising what one loving word can do. So what does that mean? That I'm never allowed a harsh word? (You got it!) Not really, but knowing how much impact I have on the tone of the household, it does make me consider before I let that harsh word out. And, not being exactly a saint (yet), I have been known to unleash some anger or resentment, but as I get older (there ARE some advantages to aging, thank goodness), I'm finding you can vent your angry feelings in an unangry way. Paradox? Well, I guess what I'm trying to say is that you can let someone know you're not thrilled with what they did, without belittling the person who did it, and that seems to contribute so much to more peaceful relations. - And admitting you're wrong now and then is not the end of the world either. It surprises me how much it pleases my husband or kids to hear me admit I might have been mistaken and be willing to take another course of action. (That doesn't happen too often, of course.) And I'm even finding that sometimes other people know more than I do! Including my kids! How do you like that for a frank admission? (The kids love it, but then I remind them that they must have gotten their "smarts" from their father or me.) It also helps to look at things with a sense of humor, and there, too, we have a choice. When one of the kids spills a pitcher of milk at the dinner table, do you laugh, scream, or cry? Screaming only adds to the confusion, everyone knows it does no good to cry over spilled milk, so why not turn the situation into a joke and relieve the pressure on everyone. After all, accidents are just that...accidents. Would you turn on a guest who did the same thing one of the kids did? So it was time for the yearly shampooing of the rug anyway, and the tablecloth is washable (thank God for polyester). Oh, it was the lace heirloom? What the heck, it was going out of style anyway. No THING is ever more important than people, and the people who travel along life's highway with us are the most important in the world, so why not make the journey as enjoyable as possible? Over the years I know there were times when I have found myself being a witch with a capital B, and while it may have gotten annoyances out of my system, the havoc it created around me wasn't worth it. You know, of course, that you have the power, too. We all have the power to create our own environment. Isn't that a mind-boggler?
* Terri the Typesetter
T–Views - Week Of March 4, 1984