Keep in mind the senior theory of relativity

Spectrum
Maturity
Friday, August 8, 2003
Keep in mind the senior theory of relativity: Age is only a number
Terri Andersen Senior Moments
Recently someone wanted to know how come the sun darkens the skin but lightens the hair. [I'm sure there's some logical scientific explanation.] What I'd like to know is how come, as we get older, our waist gets thicker and our hair gets thinner. Why can't it be the other way around — thinner waist and thicker hair? I mentioned to one of my peers that my hair is getting patchy lately, and she knew exactly what I was talking about. She said she had the same problem. The first time I noticed a little bare spot on the crown of my head was when I was caught on video by someone shooting from behind where I was sitting. [Now I have to check the back of my hair in a mirror in addition to having to check to see if all my teeth are in my mouth and my eyeglasses are on my face before I leave the house.] I guess no matter how old we get we're still somewhat of a slave to vanity. - A woman who said she could relate to the thinning hair problem told me how she handles it. She said she back-combs the top section of her hair (what they called “teasing” in the old days?) and then sprays it in place. That way the hair doesn't lie flat on the head so it de-stresses the thinness of the tresses. I find that works, as long as a strong wind doesn't come along or I don't get caught in the rain. Another discomfort in aging is when the memory goes into temporary arrest and the person whose name you're trying to remember teases you with, "Having a senior moment?” Actually, anyone of any age can be caught off guard and be unable to immediately come up with the name of someone he or she hasn't seen in a while. I find the solution to that problem is to give myself a moment or two, and the information will usually surface. If it doesn't, I go through the A-Z file in my head and it always amazes me that my brain stops at the right letter and the name I want pops up. A friend of mine, who after a few “senior moments” convinced herself that her memory was terrible, automatically says, “You'll have to excuse me, but my memory is awful these days.” Yet, when we get into a conversation and she doesn't dwell on that fact, she does just fine in the memory department. I hate to see anyone give in to the notion that age automatically messes up the memory (especially if they're younger than I am). Regarding age in general, it's surprising how someone can be considered young and old at the same chronological stage of life. I remember when I first retired and decided to see what the Senior Center had to offer. People there ranged from the 60s to the 90s in age, and it was nice to be considered one of the young ones again. At my last job, I was one of the oldest employees around because people were eligible for retirement at 55 and I started working there when I was 56. For my 60th birthday they had a big celebration (balloons, streamers, banners, big cake and even hired a minstrel to serenade me). They celebrated my 65th, too, but by then I was often asked how come I wasn't retiring like everybody else and I had to explain that even though I was old enough I didn't have enough years of service yet. I have to admit, even though my supervisors were always younger than I was (I went through two who retired and the last one was still in his 30s), they treated me like an equal and took me to lunch for all my birthdays. Another little perk I enjoyed was when the younger secretaries came to me for crossword puzzle answers I knew because of my age — like Dunne or Castle for an “Irene” clue, Ida for a “Lupino" clue, or Bela for a “Lugosi" clue. Those were movie stars in my time, and most younger people never heard of them. All of which brings me to the theory of relativity regarding aging. If at a certain age one can be considered old in one situation and young in another, it just goes to show that age is relative. It's only a number. How one thinks and what kind of attitude prevails is what really matters. I've met people in their 80s who had more vitality than people half their age, and young people who looked at everything as a bore and had no enthusiasm for anything. So what does all of this prove? Absolutely nothing! Have a great day no matter what your age. Terri Andersen is a New Milford resident.